Don't Call it a Comeback...

I'm back...

Damn. It's been a long time. Guess I got caught up in life. Which I guess can be good and bad depending on how you look at it. 2011 was a crazy year to say the least. I can't believe how many things have happened this past year. 2011 was definitely a year full of downs which  I never thought would turn into ups, but, the ups did occur. I lost my best friend, the love of my life, and a few family members in a short period of time and to top it off I quit smoking (almost two years now) and both of my parents were hit hard by the economy and its issues.I was told I had a vitamin D deficiency and that I might be diabetic. My arthritis continues to get worse even though I'm not even 25 yet and every day I wake up with a migraine. In all hoensty I never thought it was going to get better. With every passing day nothing seemed to be getting better, but boy was I wrong. I got a few odd jobs which got me out of my "cave" i so frequently isolated myself in and put a little cash in my pocket. The cash in my pocket grew to be enough money to pay for the fixes needed on my car. I had never felt more like a real person then I did when i paid for my car ($1100) with my own hard earned money. Not long after I was hired at Radioshack which is where I am still working to this day (seven months and counting. That's a record for me). Even with things starting to look up I was more stressed than ever. Money was tight. Really tight. Scary tight. I would go to bed every night and pray to God that there would be some solution to help us keep our house. I wouldn't care if I had nothing left in this world but the clothes on my back and a few good memories to keep me going, but I didn't want my parents to lose something tha they worked their entire lives to achieve. If it wasn't for certain family members and friends, we would've lost everything. And we almost did. I only make so much working a minimum wage job and only have so much to give. Then the BEST news came. My moms social security came through. It was as if an anvil had been lifted off my chest and I could finally breathe again. Every month when the bills are due it's still a struggle but I have my faith restored that we'll be able to make it through. I don't wake up every morning wondering if I'm going to have a place to live the next day.

2011 may have started off on a sour note...

...but it for sure as hell ended on a sweet one.

A word to the wise...



 I feel as though all I do now is get on here and write a blog about how I'm still here, I'm so busy, and I plan on writing more in the near future. Obviously I haven't fulfilled this goal of mine and obviously I'm here to write the same thing over again about still being here, being busy, and planning on writing more in the near future. I apologize to any of you (if there are any) who read this and have been waiting or have lost patience and have abandoned all hopes of me ever posting another blog. I hope in the very near future I will blog a lot more because God knows I have a shit load on my mind a lot that needs to be said. I will say one thing, I blog for me. If anyone takes anything away from what I write and uses it to their own benefit, that's awesome. I love helping people, relating to people, making people feel better and all that stuff... BUT I don't do this for people to go around having conversations about and make speculations. If you want to tell others about my blog because you think it's interesting and they should read it then by all means do so. But do NOT go around running your mouth about anything I say in here because you're "worried" about me or because you "assume" I said something that I didn't. I'm an adult and I think I have proven that time and time again as well as if you have something to say than you damn well better say it to my face. Nothing pisses me off more than people thinking I'm some little kid and when I say something "scandalous" my mom needs to be informed about it right away. Give me a fucking break. Everyone is more than welcome to leave comments (whether positive or negative) and I will respond. I will NOT tolerate people running their mouths about me without talking to me about it first. I have a huge problem with people who are too scared to confront me and go around letting gossip come from their loose lips. I know I'm talking in circles ranting and raving like a lunatic, but this shit has been pissing me off for some time now (basically since I started blogging). It's one of the main reasons I've been hesitant to write anything recently. Like I said before, I'm blogging for me. I love for people to read what I write whether you like what I have to say or not. But I don't need to feel as though I'm being judged for the things I say because I don't want to have to restrain myself from saying all the things that I want/need to say. If you think this is directed towards you, than that's your first mistake. Don't make assumptions. This blog post is directed to multiple people and the population in general. I hope y'all will continue to read my blog and that more and more people will start reading it as well.

I'm always going to be who I am...

...so quit trying to stop me.

How Long Gone...

Explanation coming soon...

Damn... it's been a long time. I'm not even going to go through the whole apology thing since I seem to be disappearing lately and reappearing weeks later. Things have been so crazy lately in my life that I haven't had any time or energy to do any blogging. But I'm back! I hope. I have so much to catch up on and I hope I can do so very soon. This is a pre-warning that some of my near future posts may have to do with things that have happened in the last few months while others may have to do with things that happened earlier this week. So stay tuned 'cause a whole shit load of blogs shall be coming your way very soon.

Thanks for hanging in there with me throughout this crazy journey we call life...

...Loves to all, Carolyn

p.s. Happy 4th to everyone! Hope no one got burned...

Seeing Red...

So I have been posting something every day for the past couple of days, as well as posting my month of April thingy, and everything was fine and dandy. Yesterday I attempt to get onto blogger and they say they are experiencing problems and doing maintenance, blah blah blah. Well I finally get on here (obviously) and come to find out, that somehow two of my posts have been deleted. No idea where they went or why/how they disappeared. But *poof* they be gone. And now I'm pissed. I know something this small shouldn't make me pissed, but hey, what can I say, that's just who I am. So, I will be redoing and reposting both of those when I get a chance, but if they suddenly reappear and you see two of the same thing, I apologize for the repetition. Now I must go and have a calming "woosa" moment.

hummmmmmmmmmmmmmm, hummmmmmmmmmmmmmm

As you slide down the banister of life...

...may the splinters never point in the wrong direction

Day Six... (Trading Lives)

If I could trade places with someone for a day I would choose Bethany Joy Galeotti. I admire her for so many things. Besides her beauty, she is an amazing actor, singer, and all around real person. Of course I've never met her, but I follow her blog and watch One Tree Hill religiously. Based on the way she carries herself, she seems like an ordinary down to earth kinda girl with a big heart who just lives life the way she wants. Plus her husband is gorgeous and they just had their first baby girl, Maria. Congrats you two! (I'm totally jealous since I myself can't have babies).

So here's to you Bethany Joy Galeotti...

...thanks for being such an inspiration.